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I disagree with the statement that destiny is a matter of choice.
uses general and personal examples as support to the main idea; (4) stays completely on topic; Needs: (1) transitions between paragraphs would make it read more smoothly; (2) point of view statement should be moved up to the ﬁrst paragraph; (3) some vague words like “a lot,” Television is loud.
It’s so loud that the only messages you get are the ones the producers want you to get.
Shifts to and from ice ages to warmer epochs cause enormous changes in the world—from sea levels to the distribution of life itself upon this planet.
Time itself changes the world—and with time, those natural planetary actions that come about with time: erosion, volcanic disturbances, seismic activities, wind patterns, all contribute to changing this world.
I would hope that your life experience enables you to think creatively and see many paths that will take you to the same goal.
By the time a person is in his 40’s he has experienced a lot, both good and bad, and can anticipate the potential outcome of his actions much better than he could at 20 or 30 years old. As a newly licensed driver, I know that while my insurance rates reﬂect the willfulness of 20 year olds rather than the better judgment used by 40 year old drivers, who have some of the lowest insurance rates.There is no escaping destiny through choice or achievement.If you are destined to be swept away in a major hurricane, you shall be.This has been true through times past and is certainly true in our world today. First, in the sense that sometimes we are the aggressors and, second, in the sense that we are all still human—and these things make us the enemy. The world exists in and of itself, and the world has changed in many ways since the so-called ‘big bang’ put this universe into existence.It seems that people are always looking for reasons to ﬁght each other. In a civil war, brother ﬁghts brother, friend ﬁghts friend and neighbor ﬁghts neighbors. These are groups of people who have the same backgrounds. Now, even if we weren’t being aggressors in this situation, does that mean that we aren’t the enemy? It is only for the last few thousand years that humans (let alone humans actually deﬁned as “citizens”) have held enough sway to commit any sort of changes upon it.I think the mute button is the single most important contribution to the world since chocolate. Maybe in local discount stores where the noise level is so high it’s mind-numbing. Sometimes you have to go to the library or the book store to get one.I’d like to see the mute button improved quite a bit, though. At the very least, you have to get up to get it, instead of switching it on from your chair. On the most basic levels, we are the same - humans.Some are born kings, some are born beggars, some people achieve the greatness that they knew lurked in their fates, some have this fated greatness thrust upon them—although both greatnesses are equally predestined—no human, believing in the fact of destiny, can do anything to avert this same said destiny.Belief in destiny means a belief in that which humans cannot know, a predetermined span of existence that one can only wait to experience; notions of choice or achievement have no place within the fatalistic framework of the idea of human destiny.3 (Ace the SAT Writing Even If You Hate to Write): Done well: (1) uses a relevant quote; (2) clearly states point of view on topic; (3) good use of several vocabulary words; (4) stays relatively on topic; Needs work: (1) a number of punctuation errors; (2) switching between ﬁrst and third person; (3) too much repetition of word “destiny”; (4) supporting examples are vague. Benjamin Franklin is often quoted because his wisdom was so timeless. The people that I know who are in their 20’s are either in college or are recent college graduates who are trying to ﬁnd jobs.When people get into their 30’s, they are in jobs that they will probably hold until they retire.At this time in their lives, they may also be married and raising children, all of which are probably better done with a sense of humor. Franklin also included creativity in his deﬁnition of “wit,” as by the time you are 30.